Sunday, April 5, 2009
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Sadness Visit
Since long time i didnt taste the tear drop and hold it in my eye and crying inside heart....... The sadness visit in this evening make my mood drop till the bottom.
Driving along the way to the hospital university. This is different feeling with normal day due to i go to visit my neighbour" relationship seem like my sister". i remember last 2 visit to hospital is a happiness but this time i feel scare and reluctant to accept the reality coz i visit a cancer patient.
I steped in the door and she cant recognised me. She told me she easy forget memory recently. I told her my nickname. She smile and remember back me. i felt surprised that her look change a lot due to the cancer make her suffering. When the time we talked together, she start headache and complaining the head so pain. At that moment, i feel my self cant help her anything, i m really dont know what to do. Console her ?
When her boy friend away for awhile, she talked to me why she become like this? she told me she is very suffering because her family worry her and her family need to take care of her. She told me she want to be in normal life but she felt that she cant control her life and fate of life. When the time she talked to you, i was really wanna tear drop and cry ..... coz i cant answer her... i hold her hand.... i hold her hand tiely..... luckily i didnt cry coz i know if i cry she will cry too...... what for i come to visit her and make her cry. i should comfort her and make her happy....
After a while, i changed my topic and talked about travelling. she likes to travel as me. i told her i will go to travel to Shanghai in September and detail of the trip. besides that, i told her some stories for my KK 4 years study there. I tried to comfort her feeling and advised to do chanting in normal time. She told me not easy to chanting coz her painful make her cant concentrate chanting. i hold her hand and let her feel my warm and i m supporting her. She also tiely my hand and told me take care myself. The moment when a patient ask u to take care ..... how is my feeling ? my eye become red colour and tear around my eye......
Suddenly myself feel hard to voice out coz once i voice out the sound is crying sound..... The painful she suffering i think normal people like us is hard to imagine... she said she want to cry due to the painful from her head.
I dont like to experience the close relationship people leave me and see them suffering and i cant do anything about that. I m a person so greedy about that. I want all love surrounding me forever. I scare it will lose in 1 day. Like my 1st love broke up, i need to spend 1 year plus to recover my sadness. i know it is not right to have this attitude.
No matter how she will become to.... Mui Har ..... i will hold ur hand and support u ...... U r like my sister..... i m really the darkness sky change to rainbow sky......... The life is not just sick and sad...
Regards
Ken
Driving along the way to the hospital university. This is different feeling with normal day due to i go to visit my neighbour" relationship seem like my sister". i remember last 2 visit to hospital is a happiness but this time i feel scare and reluctant to accept the reality coz i visit a cancer patient.
I steped in the door and she cant recognised me. She told me she easy forget memory recently. I told her my nickname. She smile and remember back me. i felt surprised that her look change a lot due to the cancer make her suffering. When the time we talked together, she start headache and complaining the head so pain. At that moment, i feel my self cant help her anything, i m really dont know what to do. Console her ?
When her boy friend away for awhile, she talked to me why she become like this? she told me she is very suffering because her family worry her and her family need to take care of her. She told me she want to be in normal life but she felt that she cant control her life and fate of life. When the time she talked to you, i was really wanna tear drop and cry ..... coz i cant answer her... i hold her hand.... i hold her hand tiely..... luckily i didnt cry coz i know if i cry she will cry too...... what for i come to visit her and make her cry. i should comfort her and make her happy....
After a while, i changed my topic and talked about travelling. she likes to travel as me. i told her i will go to travel to Shanghai in September and detail of the trip. besides that, i told her some stories for my KK 4 years study there. I tried to comfort her feeling and advised to do chanting in normal time. She told me not easy to chanting coz her painful make her cant concentrate chanting. i hold her hand and let her feel my warm and i m supporting her. She also tiely my hand and told me take care myself. The moment when a patient ask u to take care ..... how is my feeling ? my eye become red colour and tear around my eye......
Suddenly myself feel hard to voice out coz once i voice out the sound is crying sound..... The painful she suffering i think normal people like us is hard to imagine... she said she want to cry due to the painful from her head.
I dont like to experience the close relationship people leave me and see them suffering and i cant do anything about that. I m a person so greedy about that. I want all love surrounding me forever. I scare it will lose in 1 day. Like my 1st love broke up, i need to spend 1 year plus to recover my sadness. i know it is not right to have this attitude.
No matter how she will become to.... Mui Har ..... i will hold ur hand and support u ...... U r like my sister..... i m really the darkness sky change to rainbow sky......... The life is not just sick and sad...
Regards
Ken
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Life So Uncertainty .....Cancer
I grow up in chinese new village. Since i was young, i used to be mix around with my neighbour playing those kind funny games such as "抓豹虎”， “放风筝”，“打羽毛球”，“煮菜”和“钓鱼”。Those happy moment still in my mind. My close childhoodmates is older than me 4 years. He is the guy most close with me even we were different age. Since primary school i alway went to his house and spent whole day with him for weekend. my neighbour seem like second house. I remember deeply that we went to pasar malam every saturday. Saturday is a most happy day i waiting for in whole week. We went to pasar malam bought foods to eat and sometimes will went to his friend house to chit chat. Those time i was young still not popular with mamak store.
Time pass so fast, when i was form 2, he fell sick brain cancer. I knew that brain cancer make him so suffering. He is a one of among strong person i ever see. As we know cancer treatment is a very painful treatment for human. I have accompany him pass through all the time for treatment and in hospital. i have NEVER see him cry or complaining the painful treatment. I dont know whether we grow up in a poor family, poor family maybe teach us lesson must TAHAN bitter. Life so uncertainty, he was 20 years old young guy need to face the most difficulty in his life. He was a wise spend person, he didnt like to spend money with not neccessary. He always told me and remind me spend wisely. I still remember. he told me " please finish ur dishes, coz african cant even have chance to eat." He alway think his family 1st, he didnt want to burden his family coz of his sick. What i can say....... Such a good guy and alway think family 1st. Why he had to suffer this sick ...... life uncertainty .... He did a twice operation but the cancer spread and grow back in his brain. Finally he lose this battle but i know he was a Hero coz he did a lot of things that i can remember and even i have practice now...... Wei Keng , Even time pass 12 years, i still remember u.
Mui Har, is like my sister. She is older than me 5 years, she is Wei Keng sister. Why god have to make their family member to get horrible Cancer. last 2 years, she is fligthing battle with cancer until now. In this 2 years, when i have chance meet her, i wont dare to ask about her condition. I will talk about travel and myself. She like to travel same as me " backapacker". Recently i saw her condition become weaker and weaker. i really feel very sad how come a gal planning to marry with her boy friend. Now everything is uncertainty for her, she didnt did any wrong things. she likes to do charity work too. I heard this evening she admitted hospital, she didnt eat anything this 2 days..... i Feel WORRY and really hope she can recover back. Coz she has promised me she and her boy friend will go to Gunung Ledang with me. We have a chance to backpack travel. Dont Give Up Mui Har...... u need to be strong enough to pass through ur critical path. A lot happiness waiting for u. U told me u wanna be a volunteer for buddish organisation. This wish will come so soon for u. I tell u, this a article i dedicate to u. i know u dont even know this blog. My tear drop coz i treat u as my sister.... Mui Har u told me i m like u brother. yes i m ..... Sister... please be strong enough..... i will pray for u ..... Amitabha
Time pass so fast, when i was form 2, he fell sick brain cancer. I knew that brain cancer make him so suffering. He is a one of among strong person i ever see. As we know cancer treatment is a very painful treatment for human. I have accompany him pass through all the time for treatment and in hospital. i have NEVER see him cry or complaining the painful treatment. I dont know whether we grow up in a poor family, poor family maybe teach us lesson must TAHAN bitter. Life so uncertainty, he was 20 years old young guy need to face the most difficulty in his life. He was a wise spend person, he didnt like to spend money with not neccessary. He always told me and remind me spend wisely. I still remember. he told me " please finish ur dishes, coz african cant even have chance to eat." He alway think his family 1st, he didnt want to burden his family coz of his sick. What i can say....... Such a good guy and alway think family 1st. Why he had to suffer this sick ...... life uncertainty .... He did a twice operation but the cancer spread and grow back in his brain. Finally he lose this battle but i know he was a Hero coz he did a lot of things that i can remember and even i have practice now...... Wei Keng , Even time pass 12 years, i still remember u.
Mui Har, is like my sister. She is older than me 5 years, she is Wei Keng sister. Why god have to make their family member to get horrible Cancer. last 2 years, she is fligthing battle with cancer until now. In this 2 years, when i have chance meet her, i wont dare to ask about her condition. I will talk about travel and myself. She like to travel same as me " backapacker". Recently i saw her condition become weaker and weaker. i really feel very sad how come a gal planning to marry with her boy friend. Now everything is uncertainty for her, she didnt did any wrong things. she likes to do charity work too. I heard this evening she admitted hospital, she didnt eat anything this 2 days..... i Feel WORRY and really hope she can recover back. Coz she has promised me she and her boy friend will go to Gunung Ledang with me. We have a chance to backpack travel. Dont Give Up Mui Har...... u need to be strong enough to pass through ur critical path. A lot happiness waiting for u. U told me u wanna be a volunteer for buddish organisation. This wish will come so soon for u. I tell u, this a article i dedicate to u. i know u dont even know this blog. My tear drop coz i treat u as my sister.... Mui Har u told me i m like u brother. yes i m ..... Sister... please be strong enough..... i will pray for u ..... Amitabha
Monday, January 12, 2009
Still Learning Stage in Life Circle
Everyday we are learning how to live more meaningful and achieve the higher stage in our life. Life can be various type of defination. The important point is we should have a balancing point in my life.
Nowaday the society become more materialistic, people just look the luxury car and and branded stuffs. Actually the the brightness place there is still have a hiden darkness street. Public may ignore the a group of helpless people in the society. Old Folk house is a place public usually forgotten. Old Folk is a group of people experience the age we are now, they have contribute their energy to the country. unfortunately, in the elder age, they are unable to find the sustenance and get illness. their body not allow them to carry out their job.
Old Folk house is the place for old folk to pass their the rest of their life. Last week, we went the old folk house in 广东义山. We Collect the money from among of our kindness in charity activitys' frens. In economic crisis and chinese new year coming soon, we still able to collect the quite a good amount to run our activity. We are quite lucky and happy to have friends like that. Share our happiness and help the those unfortunately people in the society.
When we reach to the old folk house, we met a group of volunteers were carryout their job in the olf folk house. We saw around 20 people of them split into a few subgroup to carryout their works such as cleaning the floor, prepare lunch for old folk, cleaning the bed, help old folk to bath, barber for old folk, arranging the stocks in the store ( foods ) and checking old folk body. We were there feel guitly due to we unable to coorperate with them to help old folk. The person in charge in the old folk house told us this group volunteers are very kindness and show their big love. They come to old folk house every sunday no matter any special day fall into that day. They come to the old folk house just bring the love to the old folk and hope to share happy to the old folk. Their intention is very pure and beauty. One of their team member come to talk to us in the old folk house. He got share with us a sentence with very meaningful" Today we help people, Tomorrow we may need people to help us. life is uncertain. life is not just sleep, wake up, working, or entertainment. there is somethings out there we can do it ."
I m so imprised by this group of volunteers. thanks for enlightenment my life.... the world with ur kindness heart, the darkness place will change to brightness place. the cooling place will change to warmness place....
Because of u, we can see the greatness of love.....
Regards
ken
Thanks for everyone who contributed their money and heart to this activity. Amitabha
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Title is no Title
Quite long time i didnt update my blog. tonight feel that need to response to my supportive friends. New Year is reaching to us, i would like to wish everybody happy new year. Seem like the wishes as usual. wish or no wish is no different.... am i right? even though i wish everybody "发财”。。。Do u think everyone will rich like pig head?
Cow year starting seem like hardcore for everyone due to economic crisis. Malaysia electronic field pay cut, retrenchment, and compulsory take leave. Chinese New Year coming soon, some companies still got good profit for last year but boss will take advantage from that economic crisis reason for no Bonus....... Boss got right to do that but the way treat staffs is not proper way. As we know Chinese New Year we need spend a lot money for preparing big days......
Haih .... Life is uncertain... Cherish the good time and taste the bad time too...
Wisely Spend Year
Regards
Ken
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